|
Sanctuary Trauma
A trauma is an event or process which threatens life or life's meaning.
Traumas include being abused, experiencing losses and divorces.
A witness to trauma experiences the trauma -
if your brother was spanked severely, you were traumatized as well.
Traumas caused by persons rather than natural disasters are more
difficult to resolve, especially if they are intentional.
"Sanctuary" is a place where we are free from judgement, verbal abuse, violence - it is a
place we go to be completely safe. Home and a psychologist's office
are two examples of places
we can call sanctuaries. Being with people on whom we depend - like a doctor, spouse, or
parent - or whom we have
grown to trust completely - like a priest or minister - can be called a "sanctuary".
Being hurt by those who should be protecting or nurturing us
is a betrayal of
sanctuary. The trauma experienced is called sanctuary trauma.
This sanctuary betrayal is the most difficult wound to heal and
most frequently occurs in family or primary relationships.
The church, school, friends, health care and legal systems
may be other sources of sanctuary trauma.
Chronic stress as a result of this type of trauma over time
can produce post trauma stress reactions; anyone who has experienced
ongoing sanctuary trauma has experienced chronic abuse.
Living with someone who
"rages," for example, is a common source of
sanctuary trauma.
Verbally, emotionally or physically abusive parents
or spouses can cause a variety of physical, nervous and psychological disorders in their
victims as a result of such sanctuary trauma.
Freeing one's self from an environment that is no longer a sanctuary is the
first step to recovery. Seeking help from experts is the next.
Traditional
family therapists are not advised - they often cause more damage than not.
If the trauma
was caused by abuse, shelters and therapists who run rehab centers for abusive men will
provide the most effective help for victims. Patricia Evans, the world-renown expert on verbal
abuse, does phone consultations, too. See her website for more information.
(See definitions of Violence)
Sources:
Claudia Williamson, LCSW ;
|
